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I.Q. Jones
Decpacito I.Q. Jones, also known as Daddy, dat nigga, or bully rat um, is known to be the only person on the Corny Collins Show to defeat Ricardo Milos with his dancing skills, and also the only known member with F.P.E (Fat Pussy Energy), meaning he is ready at any time for childbearing. Oof what a daddy ��(Yall he's the best character in the entire movie with his one second of screentime I SWEAR. The line is his name which can only be heard by those who have the ��️ig g��️y.) Also, referred to as P.P ( Perry The Platypus) for his iconic green suit guys. (I swear I'm not color blind) (His suit is really green). He was in the Vietnam war and lost both of his legs in the carnage. He is also thicc and an Epic Gamer. His age is unknown to man. Link only WISHES he could be as cool as I.Q. You can't handle this raw power. His unchallengeable powers include (but are not limited to): Eye lasers, flight, teleportation, x-ray vision, plot armour, and racism. He had a short affair with Corny Collins during the Vietnam war. Collins was attracted to his F.P.E but eventually they had to end it when Collins said no homo �� I.Q vowed to get revenge on Brenda for stealing Corny away, but was redrafted into the war in which he proceeded to obliterate Pablo Escobar and the entire Mexican drug cartel by inhaling their whole stash of pure cocaine before they could ship it. IQ Jones has the biggest penis in the galaxy. President Barack Obama personally phoned IQ whilst the War on Terror was raging on. The US Military saved approximately $233M on missiles because IQ hit the dab like Wiz Khalifa and wiped out half of the Middle East (children included). He was presented a Medal of Honour for both his service and extremely wide penis. He also cured Helen Keller’s sight and hearing by peeing in her tonsils. In the deleted version of Endgame, Corny Collins and I.Q have a showdown to decide who is the most powerful being alive, When Corny Collins wiped out half the universe, I.Q was sent by the Avengers to stop him. He was able to one-shot Corny, but the emotional tax of killing his ex-lover caused him to go insane. He ate the infinity stones and shoved the infinity gauntlet up his ass before proceeding to nuke all of South America. Jones now spends his days as an apex predator in Los Angeles destroying every soy boy that comes within a 10 mile radius. эта сперма на вкус как горчица. This is footage of him chasing down his prey https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yj5ec0pS1XI This is the song that played at his medal ceremony https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1MwJgq9tljk Trivia * Can destroy planets using 0.01% of his power * Knows the secret of the universe and it's creation * Had 9 wives (all deceased) * Drinks snake bile * Defeated Thanos * Beat Ultra Instinct Shaggy in an arm wrestle using only his pinky finger * Cause of the Big Bang * Expected the Spanish Inquisition * Took part in the Crusades * Young Sheldon’s best friend * Constantly experiencing a bruh moment * Has known contact with The Bye Bye Man * Punched Saitama and inflicted damage * Professional Fisher * Professional Welder * Reoccurring character in Family Guy * Out-flexed Phil Swift * Has an infinite N-Word pass * Can pee with a boner * Has a thot, libtard and soyboy kill count of 9748 * ꖌリ��∴ᓭ ℸ ̣ ⍑ᒷ ᒷリℸ ̣ ╎∷ᒷ ᒲ╎リᒷᓵ∷ᔑ⎓ℸ ̣ ᒷリᓵ⍑ᔑリℸ ̣ ᒲᒷリℸ ̣ ℸ ̣ ᔑʖꖎᒷ ꖎᔑリ⊣⚍ᔑ⊣ᒷ * Full Ancap and is a dealer of recreational nuclear weapons * Did a speedrun of every Metal Gear, Halo, Super Mario, Grand Theft Auto, Pokemon and Lego licensed game simultaneously with his eyes closed while using only his dick on the controllers * True heir to the throne of Gondor * May one day chug the worlds entire clean water supply within seconds just to quench his thirst on a hot summers day * Has a 13 square mile cock (flaccid) * P U S S Y D E S T R O Y E R * His cum can be used to fuse metals * Busted the worlds fattest nut while pounding Corny from the back which resulted in the Chernobyl explosion (and also often hotboxes in the elephants foot room of Chernobyl) * Disciple of Kek Category:The Corny Collins Show Members Category:Hairspray (2007 film) Characters Category:Male characters